Walking in someone’s shoes

It’s hard to understand someone’s biases, prejudices, and internal narrative without first walking in their shoes.

Of course, you can’t truly walk in someone else’s shoes. Every journey is different. Internal narratives are internal for a reason.

Following in someone’s footsteps, however, could help bring some clarity. But, then again, if your walking in the wrong direction it doesn’t help us get to the places we want to go.

Telling people to “do this” or “don’t do that” doesn’t build much trust. Teaching people a lesson that they will never forget doesn’t inspire people to change either.

The answer then is to walk in your own shoes. March to a beat of your drum. Live a life that others might emulate.

PC

People are going to say things that are totally offensive, politically incorrect, and completely wrong from your perspective.

We have to understand that if you choose to be down by what someone says that is your contribution not theirs.

It’s not fair. It’s not reasonable. But it will help us live a more productive life when we can avoid being stuck with how we think the world should be.

It’s when we free ourselves from our biases, our prejudices, our internal narratives that we can begin to see the world as it is.

People are full of bad moments. And they are filled with good ones too.

Agreements

We all break them.

In a moment of weakness, we rationalize it by saying their small, insignificant, not important, and it won’t hurt anyone.

Which is why anyone can feel justified in cheating on their diets or their taxes.

Our lives don’t work when we fail to keep the promises we make.

Unfavorable outcomes

Does a bad boss really stop you from doing great work?

Was it always statistically probable that you could be rear-ended by a drunk driver?

Did the economy crash because you decided to invest right then?

You choose to experience the world as you see it. For most, it’s a wild, dangerous place to live.

But don’t blame the world for being unfair because you choose to do lousy work.

Things happen.

Taking responsibility

The reason why people’s lives do not work is that they fail to take full responsibility for their actions.

But what about the economy or the environment or disabilities or mental illnesses?

It is true there are many things we cannot control.

Yet, the sooner we can accept that we are the cause of our suffering, the sooner we can find the peace and joy that comes from being the creators of our own universe, the writers of our own story.

To clarify, I am not suggesting that someone born with a disability is somehow the cause of the challenges they face. I am, however, suggesting that despite the constraints that someone faces, you have more power than you think you do to change the circumstances of the situation you are in.

It is your choice in how you experience your life.

Joke telling

Trying to explain a joke is a great way to bore a crowd.

Either they get the joke or they don’t.

No use in trying to manufacture a laugh.

Your message (or movement, or interview, or presentation) will not resonate with everyone. It just needs to resonate with someone.

Learning how to tell a joke though, is a great way to improve your marketing.

But, even more importantly, is knowing when it is time to kill your darlings.

Write enough bad jokes, eventually, some good ones will surface.

Was it cause and effect?

When someone cuts us off, we slam on our breaks.

Cause and effect.

It is easy to blame the other car for the trouble they have caused us.

Except, the perpetrator was only speeding along because the car behind him was tailgating.

And she is only tailgating because she is late to work.

She is late to work because her alarm did not go off this morning.

Okay. Cause, effect, effect, effect.

However, she forgot to set her alarm because the neighbor’s dog was barking all night.

The neighbor’s dog barked all night because the owner does not know how to train animals.

He does not know how to train animals because he was not allowed to have pets growing up.

He was not allowed to have pets growing up because his Mom was allergic to most animals…

There are no causes. Only effect.

Effect, effect, effect, effect, effect, effect, effect, effect.

Words matter

“You are not good enough.”

“Who do you think you are?”

“I want my money back.”

These are just words.

Human beings are really good at injecting emotion into them.

Because words matter.

They can be collated in a way to inspire (or destroy).

“I have a dream.”

“Four score and seven years ago…”

“Could you patent the sun?”

In the end, we are remembered by the words we share.