There are many truths we hold onto.
But…
It all depends on our point of view.
The story we tell ourselves of where we come from, where we are, where we are going, about our parents, how we were raised, what we were taught, what we value, what our motivation is, what the people around us expect, what we think our neighbors say…
Where we stand changes our narrative. Our narrative changes where we stand.
It’s been so ingrained in us since we were lining up after recess.
Do what you’re told. Keep your head down. Follow the simple step of instructions. (And hey, we will reward you with an A, and maybe someday, a paycheck.)
After a while, it’s easy to think the person upfront giving the directions, the boss who has been in the office for 30+ years of experience is actually leading.
But that couldn’t be further from the truth.
Experience or title doesn’t equate to strong leadership. They have as much in common as fish and money.
Leadership is measured in initiation. It’s measured by ruckus you make—how you managed to color outside the lines. Leadership is about taking us to the places we want to go, making things we want to see.
Leadership isn’t about being told what to do next. It isn’t about following the map but creating your own path with a compass.
The greatest leader we know and remember is the person who went on a limb and connected with us. Impossible to do following the person in front of us.
Each of us stands with a tension of what we are and the ideal of what we are trying to become.
This conflict causes us to constantly look to the horizon for better days ahead.
If we are always caught looking too far ahead, we tend to ignore what is right is in front of our noses. And that is the progress we have made that has led us here.
We don’t have to run away from the past. In fact, we can learn to sit with it. On the other hand, none of us will ever reach perfection, but that doesn’t stop many of us from pursuing it.
As they say, “It’s a journey, not a destination.”
Some journeys are full of yellow brick roads while others are wondering paths less traveled.
Republican or Democrat.
Religious or secular.
Conservative or liberal.
We live in a culture of choices. Today, you might be pressured to have to choose one way or another with not enough room in between.
Yet, our lives are not this binary. We don’t leave space for a new catagory to show up. Because…
It’s possible to be religious and liberal.
It’s possible to own guns and to support gun control.
Labels are a human invention, and over time, they become polarizing. Polarization destroys discourse.
People live on a spectrum. Not this or that. It’s possible to stand outside the lines that our culture draws.
And I think we could do a better job making that space more comfortable.
Acceptance isn’t just about accepting the way things as they are or how they come.
No, acceptance is about putting in maximum effort, your best foot forward and then being okay with the results.
When we put our efforts into creating conditions that lead to desired outcomes, our lives become more profitable.
Process over outcomes.
Make 2020 a process.
For many of us, New Years marks a time to begin a fresh starts. Fresh starts are important.
But the New Years portion is a human invention, a social construct. There is nothing actually significant about it except the story we tell ourselves.
It’s just another day, another opportunity.
Which means we don’t need to wait for a special day to give ourselves permission to make the change we seek to make.
It’s your turn, regardless if its the New Year, a new month, a new week…
Every passing moment is a chance to turn it all around.
How liberating to know that we don’t have to wait to begin.
Credit cards have set up a game. A game where, if you choose to play, will offer flight discounts and cashback with every purchase.
It’s so tantalizing, isn’t it? I mean, Why not? You are going to pay for groceries anyway, so you might as well capitalize on the purchase.
But I think the better question to ask is, “If I am going to say Yes to this, what am I saying No to?”
Credit Card companies have set up a system that will eventually win. They win just after missing one payment. They win when they steal your attention.
And that’s just it. Your attention is worth more than a few flight points.
The simple truth is, you improve what you measure. You also make worse whatever it is we don’t pay attention to. You can’t pay attention to everything.
To optimize is different from efficiency. Efficiency is in simplicity.
It isn’t about maximizing returns or having the most money as possible in your bank account.
Not having a credit card, freeing yourself from one game, will allow you to play another. You get to choose what that is.
At first, many won’t listen to what it is you have to say.
Over time, however, the words we say become louder. Especially, with action.
When others can begin to see the benefit of what it is you are teaching it will be harder to ignore.
We don’t always get to know the end of the story but we can see it through.
Perhaps the better question to ask is:
Where do all the bad ideas coming from?
Not every song Bob Dylan wrote was a hit. But he kept making them until some songs began to resonate.
This blog is full of bad ideas, but now 3,000+ blog post in, some good ideas begin to surface.
The thing is, you never know which ideas will take off because good taste is subjective.
That’s why the work of the Baroness Elsa von Freytag-Loringhoven, Shepard Fairey, or a Jackson Pollack isn’t going to resonate with everyone.
There is no formula, no map to follow to become famous. But is famous really the goal?
Psy is popular but you can’t argue that the work he’s done is important.
Jaqueline Novogratz, on the other hand, has done important work to help lift 200 million people out of extreme poverty and you’ve probably never heard of her.
Quality is important. No one is saying that we shouldn’t ship quality work.
But spending all of our time polishing our work, never shipping it or interacting with the community, is another form of hiding.
We delay shipping because we are afraid to be judged. The ideas have to be perfect beforehand because if we publish and no one reads it; what does that say about us? What does that say about the best we can do?
“We are not good enough.” That’s the killer of all joy. It’s the internal dialogue that is the killer of all creativity and joy.
If you have something to say, say it. Say it because we must.
Giving something away may not be perceived as valuable. In other words, you have to figure out a way to raise the stakes to get people to buy-in.
It has to cost people something. Cost is part of the narrative we tell if something is worth it.
If you are not going to charge money, then you can charge a lot of time or effort.
They say that there is no such thing as a free lunch. The people you seek to serve expect it. Use that.
