Deciding what kind of man you are going to be

(I’ll speak toward men on this post. But it certainly can apply to anyone.)

As you get older, you will see relationships fail. One of the problems I have observed is that men haven’t decided what kind of man they want to be.

For instance, if you are someone who makes a mistake and has a relationship outside of marriage; it could be a slip up. It could of been a series of bad decisions. It could be one bad moment. But often its because they haven’t decided who it is they want to be. To go further, if you know who you want to be, you will avoid certain types of situations in the first place. This goes beyond relationships, of course. Someone with the need to conquer will look for conflict.

So either it is:

A) You are either undecided.

B) You are decided but can’t admit it to yourself—which is even a worse type of self deception.

Pleasure is a strong pull for any person. And we need to decide what kind of person we will be when we interact with it or when the opportunity arises. When the pull for pleasure conflicts with your relationship, there is an out-of-alignment that will bear a high cost. The two are not mutually exclusive, regardless of how you treat them.

One last note: It is indeed interesting how far we as humans will go to avoid confronting our truths about ourselves. And the people around us suffer until we do. This is the danger of ego working.